Poems of Doubtful Hope

I. The night is so fucking dark. My soul longs for comfort. Speak comfort, I beg you! I walk alone, no eyes on me, Out from an empty house without rest. II. There's safety in the dark, Slipping through secret ways unseen. Speak comfort, I beg you! Concealed in the dark This house sits empty without peace. III. Wandering through the forgiving dark Alone, apart, unseen and unknown, I can't see the me I wish to forget  And the only guide I follow Is the burning in my heart, seeking. IV. That burning light was my guide O, that it would lead me to you! Show me to the place where you're waiting! I used to know it well, But I can't find it anymore. V. Night which guides me, Gentle night, more forgiving than the dawn. A place where lovers meet; I long to see my Beloved. Night, be that which guides me to him. VI. Once he came into my heart, A sanctuary where he sat enthroned, A dwelling place of peace and respite, I cherished him and felt that love  That evaded me wholly in the ...

Take deep breaths, count to ten As your anxiety takes hold again. Feel the tightness in your throat That roils down to your chest.  It takes everything to try at all,  So, forget about your best. Muscles tense, your hands start to shake, But you smile the smile you know looks fake. Look for the trigger, try to stay calm. Ignore those intrusive thoughts.  Take a seat if you can and close your eyes Remember you are loved — lots.  Rest assured, this too shall pass (Until your brain reaches another critical mass). But for now, you can rest. Lay yourself down. For heavy is the head That wears anxiety's crown. 

Shattered lives, healing presence. Broken hearts, peace and calm. Wounded souls, healing mercy. Gaping wounds, Gilead's balm. I'd never claim to be perfect, Nor is perfection what you need. Because when you open broken hearts The world finds healing on bended knees. I'm trying, I'm trying, I'm trying, I'm trying. Doing my best with what I can muster. I'm trying, I'm trying, I'm trying, I'm trying. Every once in a while I'll see Glimpses of who I'm meant to be.

Every day is Holy Saturday When you're living with depression. Hope came into the world, But the weight of our sins crushed it, Burying it beyond light or redemption With no new gleam over the horizon. No dawn coming to slay the dark. Depression leaves us Living between Good Friday and Easter. We know the power and pain of our sins But we haven't heard the Good News. We live like those without hope Yearning for the day it might return Unaware that day is as soon as tomorrow. But tomorrow never seems to come. Hope stays buried, And instead of waiting On the power of resurrection We try to force our own Lazarus moment. The thing that comes out of that grave, Half-formed and rotten, Isn't really hope. It's a weak and flawed approximation. But we don't control the calendar. We can't change the seasons. So we wait on Holy Saturday, Longing for an Easter That feels like it might never come.

Harassed and helpless, he saw us. Wandering away from the safety of the 99 To lose ourselves like prodigals, he knew us. The Good Shepherd knows what its like To be just another one of the sheep.  The Greatest Shepherd has felt all our pain.  And when he comes,  Triumphant and glorious,  Ready to open the scroll and declare Victory for all the captives,  Recovery for all the blind and broken, Freedom for those in bondage? He comes looking like a lamb.  Not only a lamb, but a lamb who has been slain.  The Shepherd is the lamb.  God has become a man.  His voice guides us through the darkest valleys And lights the path back to the Father Even when we think all the lights have gone out.

If God loved the world Why do his so-called "people" Spew hate everywhere? Love for your neighbor Ain't no recommendation; It's who Jesus was. Wasting all my time Runnin' like a prodigal. Dad says, "Come home, son." Who'll cast the first stone? One option available; He ain't int'rested. Treat folks like they're you. Stop arguing the meaning; Stop making it hard. Judge and you'll be judged. Your arm long enough to save? Hope so for your sake. Can you love yourself Despite the lies you believe? Look in the mirror. Put down all that hate Before you hurt yourself more. Dangerous poison. Kingdom a' Comin' The world's an awful mess still Love can save us all

There once was a knight of great courage, Dashing, handsome, and true. He saved many a helpless fair maiden; Slaying monsters, protecting virtue.  One day he passed a great cavern Billowing smoke, ominous and dread.  He gathered his fortitude, preparing to charge, Then decided to sneak off instead.  "I'm brave, but what was I thinking?" He pondered as he rode on by.  "I've faced mighty foes, but a dragon? I'm afraid I'm just not that guy." Then all down the road he was haunted By what the dragon might do.  Pillaging, slaughtering, burning of fields, Whilst the finger points squarely at you.  So, he turned his horse back to the chasm, Charging gallantly into the fray.  But all that he found was a small cook fire Smoldering in the heat of the day. So, what is the lesson to be learned here? Sometimes dragons fill us with dread.  But, before you flee, take a second to see If maybe it's all in your heard.